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Workshop Guide

A Civil Discourse Program for Elementary Students

Overview

This guide includes everything you need to plan and run your own Think&Speak! workshop series:

  • Logistics on how to host workshops

  • Promotional material / flyer guidance

  • Where to order a banner to decorate the workshop room

  • Curriculum for four 90-minute workshops

  • Details for crafts, including all needed materials

  • Homework assignments and worksheets

  • A closing letter to reinforce concepts with families

Logistics

  • Visit your local public library and make sure you have a valid library card.

  • Understand the process to reserve a room (some libraries require that an adult reserve the room).

  • Once you have the room reserved, you are ready to promote!

Promoting Think&Speak!

Dear ____________,

I hope your school year is going great. I am a ____________ (grade level) at ____________ (High School), and I am offering free workshops to promote Civil Discourse skills and confident public voices for elementary students — of course, in a fun environment! I would be grateful if you would share the attached PDF flyer with your class. Thank you so much, in advance, for any support you may offer!

Sincerely, ____________________

Workshop 1

1. Ice Breaker


Everyone introduces themselves plus two fun facts: "Hi, my name is ______. I am ____ years old. Two
fun facts about me are (I have a dog who jumps a lot, and I like to swim in the rain)."

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  • Make sure the kids know it can be two "fun" facts, or really any two details they want to share—  favorite ice cream flavor, favorite candy, favorite thing to do at recess. Give them ideas if they get stuck!

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2. Introduce Civil Discourse

 

  • Civil Discourse means talking and listening in a kind and respectful way — even when we don't agree.

  • This sounds simple, but as we see in real life, it can be very difficult.

  • So we are going to start building skills now that will help us be Civil Discourse leaders when we're all grown up.

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3. First Skill: The Confident Handshake


Making a confident first impression when you meet someone is critical — it can set the tone for all future conversations. So let's always be sure to make a confident introduction.


The handshake


1. Go around the room. Give everyone a quick/loose/floppy or OVERLY strong handshake, don't make eye contact, and quickly say "Nice to meet you" — but too quickly.
  a. Ask some volunteers to tell you what that made them feel about your "introduction."
2. Now go around the room and model: a firm grip, maintained eye contact, and "Nice to meet you" with a pleasant smile.
  a. Ask volunteers to tell you what this round made them feel.


Time for everyone to try

 

  • First, the "floppy" or "too strong" handshake, poor eye contact, and a fast "nice to meet you."

  • Then, the same student goes around again with a confident handshake, good eye contact, and "nice to meet you." Group discussion

  • How did it feel to give/receive flimsy handshakes?

  • How did it feel to give/receive confident handshakes?

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4. Second Skill: Eye Contact and Body Language

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  • Eyes show you're listening.

  • Standing or sitting tall = confidence.

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Model a poor example

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Stand up and tell the group what you like to do during summer (going swimming with friends, watching TV on weekdays, making pizzas in the pizza oven with my family) — but do NOT make eye contact, slouch, and cross your arms.

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Now model an energetic example

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Give the same speech, but this time with eye contact on everyone in the circle, standing up tall, and no crossed arms.

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5. Third Skill: Answering a Question with Detail

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If someone asks you a question, the person answering should show they respect the question by answering it thoughtfully and with detail. The classic question: "How was your day today?" How can we learn to answer with more than just a one-word answer? By adding a detail: "I'm great, I got to relax and watch TV today and not do any homework. It was just the break I needed!"

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"Basic" answers

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Go around the circle and ask each student one of these questions; each student answers with a basic answer (maybe not even a complete sentence):

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  • What is your favorite food?

  • What is your favorite holiday?

  • What is your favorite day of the week?

  • What is your favorite subject in school?

  • What is one of your favorite movies?

  • What is your favorite animal?

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Better answers

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This time, go around again with the same questions, but each student adds at least one extra detail (e.g. "my favorite ice cream flavor is cookies and cream because I love the oreo cookie crunch!").

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Talk about the difference — how did students feel when others answered with even one extra detail? (More engaged. More interesting. You learn more about the person.)

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6. Activity: Interview and Introduce

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This activity combines all the skills worked on so far: eye contact, body language, answering questions with detail, and shaking hands.

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  1. Partner up: shake hands with your partner.

  2. Introduce yourselves and share your name.

  3. Each partner asks the other a question — the person answering should answer with a detail.

  4. Then, go around the circle and each partner introduces THEIR partner, sharing one detail (e.g. "Hi, my partner's name is Jane. Jane's       favorite food is macaroni and cheese because she loves anything warm and cheesy!").

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7. How This Relates to Civil Discourse

 

  • Remember, Civil Discourse is about kind communication.

  • In order to communicate, we need the basic skills — you don't just jump to the top, you have to take baby steps.

  • If you can't shake a person's hand or make eye contact, it will be impossible to have serious conversations.

  • So if we master these skills, they become the building blocks to being Civil Discourse experts.

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See the Civil Discourse Worksheet on the following page.

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8. Optional Craft

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If there is time, do a keychain craft: make keychains with words like confident, kind speaker, thoughtful. Don't forget to pass out the homework after the worksheet.

Civil Discourse Worksheet
Think&Speak!

Name: _______________________________________________


Date: _______________________________________________


What is Civil Discourse?


Civil discourse means: talking kindly, listening carefully, and respecting others' ideas.


Part 1: Match the Word to the Meaning


Write the letter that matches each word to the correct meaning.

 

  • 1. Respect ____ 2. Listen ____ 3. Kindness ____ 4. Taking Turns ____

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Meanings: A. Waiting while someone else is speaking B. Hearing and thinking about what someone says C. Being nice with your words and actions D. Treating others the way you want to be treated


Part 2: Kind or Not Kind?


Circle Kind or Not Kind for each situation.

 

  • 1. Looking at someone while they are speaking — Kind / Not Kind

  • 2. Interrupting someone — Kind / Not Kind

  • 3. Saying "I disagree, but that's okay" — Kind / Not Kind

  • 4. Rolling your eyes when someone talks — Kind / Not Kind

  • 5. Waiting your turn to speak — Kind / Not Kind

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Part 3: Build a Strong Answer


Answer the question in a full sentence and add one detail.


Question: What is one of your favorite subjects at school?


My answer: _______________________________________________


Part 4: Introduce Yourself


Fill in the blanks and practice saying it out loud!


Hi, my name is ____________.


On Fridays after school I like to ____________, because ____________.


One of my favorite things to do is ____________ because it makes me feel ____________.


Part 5: What Would YOU Do?


Situation: Your friend says something you don't agree with. What is a kind way to respond?
_______________________________________________


Challenge Star


Draw or write ONE way you can be a kind speaker today.


You Did It! I am a confident and kind speaker!

Teacher's Signature: _______________________________________________

HOMEWORK — TO BE COMPLETED THIS EVENING

  • Shake your parent's hand.

  • Make strong, kind eye contact.

  • Ask how your parent is doing! Remember, if your parent asks how you're doing, don't forget to add a detail, such as what you enjoyed in the Think&Speak! workshop.

  • Repeat if you have another available parent!

Workshop 2

1. Recap on Civil Discourse

 

  • Last workshop, we worked on confident handshakes, good eye contact, answering questions with details, and introducing ourselves.

  • These are building blocks of Civil Discourse: being kind speakers, even if we don't always agree.

2. Ice Breaker: Two Fun Facts + a Superpower


"I'm ______; I love peanut butter, I am really good at tennis, and my superpower would be time travel." Each student shares their name, two fun facts, and a superpower they would love to have.


3. Skill 1: What Makes Someone Look Confident?

 

  1. Ask for a volunteer (whisper instructions: slouch, look down, talk in a tiny voice). The volunteer says their name, grade, and school.

  2. Ask for another volunteer (whisper instructions: stand tall, eyes forward and engaged, hands by their sides). The volunteer says their name, grade, and school.

  3. Ask the students to compare how it felt to watch each volunteer. How can you tell if someone feels confident?

  4. Ask if anyone else wants to confidently state their name, grade, and school.

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4. Skill 2: Deep Breaths


Ever since we've been little kids, people always suggest taking deep breaths — the reason is because it's proven to work! Deep breaths can calm us down, help us focus, and help us remember good posture and eye contact.

  • Practice together: breathe in through the nose, out through the mouth (a yawn is okay!). Do it again, then share how it feels.

Everyone takes a turn: stand, slowly take three deep breaths, then introduce yourself and share your favorite animal — then tell the group how it felt to take those breaths before speaking.


5. Skill 3: Simple Civil Discourse Tips


If you are speaking and someone interrupts you, what would a kind speaker do? "I'm sorry, do you mind if I finish my thought?"


Ask two volunteers to try this: one speaks about their favorite summer activity, the other cuts them off to talk about what THEY like instead — then the first speaker politely finishes their thought.


If you are speaking and someone disagrees with you, what would a kind speaker say? "I understand your idea, but I see it differently."


Ask two volunteers to come to the front: one talks about why everyone should go to summer school and do homework over summer vacation, and the other disagrees using "I understand your idea, but I see it differently," then gives a reason why.

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Have everyone partner up and practice both scenarios (being interrupted, and disagreeing kindly), then discuss how each felt.

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Complete the worksheet, then pass out homework.

🦸 Superhero Worksheet

Think&Speak! — "Superheroes Use Kind Words!"

Name: _______________________________________________


💥 What Would a Kind Speaker Do?


Read each situation, then circle or write the best superhero response.


🗣️ Scenario #1


Someone interrupts you while you are talking. What could you say?

 

  • "Be quiet!"

  • "I wasn't done speaking yet."

  • "You're so rude."

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⭐ Best superhero response: _______________________________________________


🤔 Scenario #2


Someone disagrees with your idea. What could you say?

 

  • "That's a bad idea."

  • "I see it differently."

  • "You're wrong."

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⭐ 🙂 😐 😠 Circle your superhero listening face:


😂 Scenario #3


Someone laughs at your idea. What would a kind speaker do?

 

  • Laugh back at them

  • Stay calm and keep speaking kindly

  • Walk away angrily

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⭐ Superhero words: _______________________________________________


🦸 Super Speaker Phrases


Draw a next to the phrase you want to practice today! ⭐

 

  • "I understand your idea."

  • "Can I share my opinion?"

  • "I see it differently."

  • "That's an interesting idea."

  • "Thank you for listening."

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🎤 My Superpower as a Speaker


If YOU were a speaking superhero...


My superhero name: _______________________________________________


My speaking superpower: _______________________________________________


Examples: "Captain Confidence," "Super Listener," "Kindness Girl," "Mega Speaker"


🌟 Superhero Promise


"I can use my voice with confidence and kindness."


✍️ Signature: _______________________________________________

HOMEWORK: PRACTICE BEING A SUPERHERO SPEAKER

  • Ask your parent: "How was your day?"

  • Stand tall, and keep your shoulders relaxed.

  • Make strong, kind eye contact.

  • Give a kind response, such as: "That's nice. I'm glad you had a good day!" Remember, if your parent asks how your day was, don't forget to add a detail, such as what you enjoyed in the Think&Speak! workshop.

  • Repeat if you have another available parent!​

Workshop 3

Bring the Magic Speaker Hand (so nobody speaks out of turn). We want to reinforce topics from Week 1 and Week 2, then add new skills. Explain the magic hand — to speak, we pass it around the room.


1. Civil Discourse

 

  • So why are we here in the first place — why are we learning about Civil Discourse? 

  • Does anyone feel like people are always upset or arguing?

  • Wouldn't the world be a better place if we could all be calm and speak peacefully?

  • Does anyone have an example of something they've heard at school that did not feel good?

  • How should we handle this?

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2. Handshake!


Let's look at what a strong handshake looks like. Go around the room and shake everyone's hand floppy. Tell them to wait. Once you've sat back down, give the magic hand to two people: tell me what you thought of that handshake. Then go around again, give everyone a confident handshake but DON'T look them in the eye. Give the magic hand to two people: what did you think, and what could improve? Third time: go around with a pleasant handshake and pleasant eye contact, then pass the magic hand to two people who haven't spoken — ask them to describe this version. Now have everyone practice a confident handshake with positive eye contact — slowly and purposefully, one by one, making sure everyone shakes hands.


3. Posture & Body Language


Let's all stand up. Do a big stretch, wiggle out your body. Now a deep breath. Chest out, shoulders relaxed, hands folded in front of your waist. Let's look around the room — everyone looks ready to engage, but still relaxed. (If there is an even number of people, pair them up with the person sitting across from them.) First go-around: one person says, "Hi, how are you?" and the other answers with poor posture and folded arms, "I'm fine thanks" — then they try it again with strong posture and relaxed arms. Each pair tells the group how it felt, then it moves to the next pair. Using the magic hand, once everyone is done, discuss why it makes a difference how you stand and how it makes other people feel.


4. Seated Posture


Tell them to pretend they are sitting in class and a friend is giving a presentation on a family tradition. Ask a volunteer to tell the group about a family tradition while all the other kids slouch and look away. Then ask the SAME student to tell it again, but this time everyone sits up straight, smiles, and watches the speaker. Ask the speaker to compare the two.

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Ask for more volunteers, then challenge everyone to sit with good posture in class and mention you'll ask about it next week!

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5. Answering a Question with a Detail

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Go around the table and ask everyone the same question, "How was this past week of school?" — have them give a quick answer.

 

Then go around again with the same question, but this time each student adds one detail — pass the magic hand around and ask each one which kind of answer was better.

 

Ask: why does it matter to add a detail? Is it important to have deeper conversations? Absolutely!

 

6. Putting It All Together

 

Go around the table. One person at a time gives everyone a handshake and says "nice to meet you" (firm shake, nice eye contact) — then returns to their seat, folds their hands, and says: "My name is __________, I'm in 10th grade, and I love to read fantasy books. Nice to meet you all."

 

Make sure listeners are practicing sitting upright with a pleasant, engaged face.

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7. New Activity: Unpopular Opinion

 

Everyone thinks of an opinion that most of us would disagree with, such as "vegetables are better than chocolate," "you should only watch TV for an hour a week," "going to the beach is not fun," "cats are better than dogs," "we should get homework over summer vacation," "pineapple belongs on pizza," or "it is important for us to do chores at home."

 

  • Give everyone the Unpopular Opinion worksheet and a pencil.

  • Have them think of their unpopular opinion, then two reasons why they believe it (fill in Items 1, 2, and 3 on the worksheet).

  • Everyone prepares a very quick speech; when ready, they can practice one-on-one with the instructor for feedback, then present.

  • At the end, each person can share (holding the magic hand) why that was difficult but why it was important to listen to everyone's reasons — and even if they didn't agree, what did they learn? Is it okay to agree to disagree?

  • Each student fills out Items 4 and 5 on the worksheet, then volunteers can share what they wrote.

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8. Craft: Bookmark

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  • Paste two different colors together.

  • On one side, they pick one of these quotes (they must pick one): "We can agree to disagree." "I am a confident speaker." "I am a kind speaker." "I am a strong speaker."

  • On the other side, they write their name and the date: [DATE].

  • The instructor will laminate, then everyone does a hole punch and adds a tassel. If there is time, make bonus bookmarks.

Unpopular Opinion! Worksheet

Think & Speak!

1. What "unpopular opinion" would you like to defend?
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________


2. Reason 1 that you believe in your unpopular opinion:
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________


3. Reason 2 that you believe in your unpopular opinion:
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________


4. Post-Activity Reflection: How did it feel to speak about something that most people do not believe or
feel the same way about?
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________


5. Post-Activity Reflection: How did it feel to listen to others giving explanations about their unpopular
opinion? What did you do to be a thoughtful listener?
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________

Please share the topics we covered together in Think&Speak! today on the car ride home, if
possible:

  • ​Confident Handshake

  • Pleasant Eye Contact

  • Good Posture

  • Relaxed Arms

  • Sitting Up Straight During Class

  • Actively Listening While People Speak

  • Giving a Speech to Defend an Unpopular Opinion

  • Actively Listening to Other Unpopular Opinions

  • Making Bookmarks

  • Don't forget your homework!​

Next week: We will add "How to Respond with Respect."

Thank you, and I look forward to seeing you next time at [DATE] at [TIME]!

Workshop 4

First: did anyone do the homework? Get some feedback on it.
Second warm-up: speaking for 30 seconds without saying "umm" or "like" (give people second chances). Prompt: What are you doing for summer / what are you looking forward to about summer?


Review of Week 3: Quick Rounds of Volunteering


1. Answering a Question with a Detail


Ask for a volunteer to stand up and go around the room asking each person a question (alternate between): "How was your week at school?" and "Are you excited about the weekend?" — make sure everyone answers with a detail. Repeat with more volunteers if anyone wants to.


2. Making Eye Contact While Introducing Yourself and Shaking Hands


Ask for a volunteer to go to each person, shake hands, say "Hi, my name is __________, it is great to be in class with you," and keep nice eye contact. Repeat with more volunteers if anyone wants to.


3. Short Speech


Ask for a volunteer to come to the front and tell the class about a family tradition (or something fun they plan to do this summer) and why they like it. Then ask another volunteer to ask the speaker a question about it that shows they listened. Repeat if anyone wants to!


Ask if anyone remembered to sit up straight and look focused in class — if anyone wants to share an example, that's great.


Did anyone hear anyone say anything mean to them or anyone around them this week? How was the situation handled?


Why Do We Talk About These Things?

 

  • We want to learn to be confident speakers.

  • We want to be kind — because why be the kind of person that is dramatic?

  • We want to be an active listener because it makes people around us feel like they matter.

 

These are all building blocks of Civil Discourse. So today, we want to be able to leave here and tell our families and friends, "Hey, I can teach you about civil discourse!"
Civil discourse means talking and listening in a kind and respectful way — even when we disagree. We can disagree without being unkind.


Write this on the board, then ask everyone to stand one at a time and read those words slowly and clearly.


Main Activity: Disagreeing Without Being Unkind


Each student takes a turn standing up in front of the class and making one of these points — then a volunteer raises their hand and says something positive about the idea (e.g. "I don't agree with that, but I can see why that might be important to you"). Here are six statements the kids can make (show the example to the volunteer privately first, have them say it in their head, then say it out loud to the group):

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  1. We should be given more homework every day, including on weekends. We should spend more time practicing what we learn in school, and homework is the best way to do that.

  2. We should have school year-round, and not have a long summer vacation — maybe just two weeks off. When we have long summers, we forget everything we did all school year, and then we just waste time watching TV.

  3. During Halloween, people should stop giving out candy because it rots our teeth and makes us too hyper.

  4. We should only be allowed screen time for one hour per week, otherwise our brains rot.

  5. We should all have to give a presentation in front of our classrooms each week to practice public speaking, and we should memorize our presentations.

  6. We should stop asking for birthday or Christmas presents and instead donate all of our gifts to people who are much less fortunate than us.

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Point out that it's interesting that even though we don't fully believe in these ideas, we could still think of something positive to say in agreement — that is a fundamental of Civil Discourse!

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Craft: Civil Discourse Journal

 

Everyone makes a civil discourse journal. Once it is decorated, fill it out:

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  • Page 1: How to define Civil Discourse — We can disagree without being unkind.

  • Page 2: My Foundational Civil Discourse Skills — eye contact, kind responses, good posture, answering questions with good detail, active listening, confident handshake.

  • Page 3: What do I want to spread in this world? (ask the group! examples: kindness, peace, harmony, love, friendship)

  • Page 4: What can I do if someone is unkind? — I can calmly tell them I disagree with what they've said; I can ask them if they would mind expressing themselves differently; I can ask them to clarify what they mean.

  • Page 5: Why is it important to agree to disagree? — Not everyone in the world will have the same opinion, so we must learn to understand that. The world will be a better place if we can all learn the value of listening to each other, even when we don't agree.

  • Page 6: Civil Discourse Diary — encourage the kids to write something down this summer about a time they practiced their civil discourse skills.

HOMEWORK: SPREAD AWARENESS ABOUT CIVIL DISCOURSE

  • Tell your parent(s) your simple, easy-to-remember definition of Civil Discourse: Civil discourse means talking and listening in a kind and respectful way — even when we disagree. We can disagree without being unkind.

  • Tell your parent(s) how you plan to react the next time you hear an idea you disagree with (for example, you may plan to say, "That's an interesting idea. Can you tell me more about why you believe this?").

A Closing Letter to Parents

Practice makes perfect!


Thank you for attending Think&Speak! at [Location]. Until we meet again, please be sure to practice these skills at least once per week:

 

  • A friendly and confident handshake: Use a nice firm grip, maintain eye contact, and keep a warm smile on your face (remember, your eyes speak too!).

  • Practice answering a question with depth: When an adult asks you a question, make it a habit to respond by adding at least one specific detail that helps the adult understand you better. For example: Adult: "How was the pizza at lunch today?" You: "It was so good. It was nice and warm, and the cheese was melted perfectly!" These little details matter — they help keep the conversation going.

  • Body language: Remember, when we are in class or listening to someone speak, try to sit tall in your chair and keep eye contact with the person speaking. It shows the speaker that we are actively listening and makes them feel respected.

  • Compare posture styles: Show an adult what poor posture looks like — slouching, crossed arms, tapping feet. Then show what composed posture looks like — relaxed arms, relaxed but straight shoulders, a deep breath, grounded feet. Ask the adult how each example made them feel when viewing you.

  • Practice simple "agreeing to disagree": Ask an adult to say, "I think you should do homework every day in summer." Instead of saying "No way!" you can impress the adult and say, "I see it differently, but I can see why you may think that is a good idea."

  • Speak clearly, speak calmly: Stand comfortably, maintain a nice expression, keep good eye contact, and ask an adult to time you for 30 seconds — in that time, tell them your favorite things to do in summer without using fillers such as "like" or "umm."


What we've done at Think&Speak! has laid the foundation for future Civil Discourse leaders in America. If you can master the skills above, they will carry you through your entire adult life. Of course, the topics may become more "serious" as we get older — but if we stick to our fundamental Civil Discourse skills, we can all be kind speakers who know how to disagree without being unkind. Practice makes perfect!


Thank you for all of your support, and I hope to see you at the next Think&Speak!


Sincerely,
[Your Name]
[Your School/Organization, Grade or Class Year]​

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